Marketing Calls

[kathynewman]

Steve answered the phone a little while ago:

Telephone conversation went like this...

Caller: Good morning could I talk to the person who looks after your web marketing
Steve: That’s me!
Caller: Good morning Sir how are you this morning.
Steve: Ok thank you.
Caller: Can I ask what you do for web marketing at the moment
Steve: No, what are you offering.
Caller: Well we can guarantee to get your site onto the first page of Google’s natural results listings.
Steve: Oh really and how do you achieve that?
Caller: We use our tool called XXXX to create a customised landing page which is keyword rich and as our site has a Page Rank of 5 this will ensure being on Page 1 of the results.
Steve: Oh really, well that’s not much better than our Page Rank of 4 at present. So this page you will create, where is that hosted?
Caller: On our site but the listing in Google will have you name on it.
Steve: So the Google result will be a page on your site with links through to our site?
Caller: Well they aren’t links but the user will be guided through to your site.
Steve: So your original statement that you can put our site onto Page 1 of the natural results was incorrect as the result will be a page on your site?
Caller: <click>

[TraceyHand]

oh oh...he called me too!!!

[kathynewman]

Well if anyone else gets the call - they should ask if they are making their way through the Actinic Forum Members List!

[gabrielcrowe]

if he is reading this, then my number is:

0845 070 0707

i'd love a call, i need my sites to come top of google.

[jont]

If you want your site to come above google call me on 020 7492 2222.

We don't guarantee 1st page listings... we guarantee your site will come above Google's own page. With over 2 weeks experience we can guarantee your site will be placed above Google, MSN and Yahoo.

How does it work? Well, this is of course top secret and involves some enhanced technical algae which our technicians have perfected but essentially when anyone starts a web browser and launches their favourite search engine yours will appear first.

Customer Testimonial:

"Thanks Jont - after just 23 minutes our site has a Page Rank of 11"

[Darren B]

hmmm not had this call yet - im a little disappointed actually

[guccij]

If you want your site to come above google call me on 020 7492 2222.

Shouldn't that be 020 7222 1234?

[Kirk]

We get those all the time. When they "guarantee page one on Google" I always ask them "for what search?". They usually stammer around and fail to come up with any relevant words at all.

[Mark H]

hmmm not had this call yet - im a little disappointed actually

It's alright Darren, they obviously don't bother phoning companies that are already on page 1

[pinbrook]

yep you can have fun with these guys. i asked one total shower if they would guarantee a particular keyphrase, they said yes, so i asked them to search on the keyphrase where they would find me already at number 1. conversation over